All of the implied violence of the first section has become more explicit through imagery relating to the female body, mollusks and their shells.
Who is speaking why – dust bunnies and the holocaust? I don’t get it.
Trust the beginning of books. Lightness can mean “want of force” and the sound of gunfire using words suggesting invagination: “draped,” “aperture,” “diptych,” “gusset,” “purl,” “pleated” and “rivelled.”
You call this a performative nature? In my Lustrelessness, norm, form and function are revealed as blithely editable. I want my terminal degree, but we’re not competing.
We’re all encased in plastic, then turned into an intonation beyond the irrigated “pirate” mind. Why not center your poems – both physically and theoretically?
Be more visual and visceral. If love poems are written in pidgin python, try a vignette about difficult communication extended beyond linguistic articulation inside the mouth and in or near the genital area.
Polemic is a bad riposte against the triumph of “whimsy,” but I want poetry to be funny. You might want to give up entirely, learn to write linearly and do your memoir.
Thinking through these questions has been a difficult but pleasurable exercise.
